Neon chicken, going to a tennis camp where there's no tennis

I'm in the army traveling on a bus. Those around me believe everyone will get their weapons taken away. We drive by an enormous clearing where the wood has been bundled according to size. The bus stops and we get out. There is a wagon-like automated vehicle and someone says that's what is going to take our guns away. We all have fencing swords and begin to jab at the vehicle. Someone suggests there may be a person inside so we pry it open to find a robot head, much like the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz.

I'm back on the bus but am now in Kentucky traveling around picking up kids to go to a tennis camp. I am the age of all the kids - late teens. Everybody gets off and back on the bus at each house we stop at. I'm standing in a garage wondering if I'm invited along to the camp - everybody else is back on the bus. An adult size chicken made of neon lighting hatches in the garage. It is hard to pick up but I want to take it along. The bus driver is gesturing for me to get on the bus but I can only bring one pet. I decide to bring a kitten in a paper bag instead of the neon chicken.

The bus dangerously careens and speeds down a narrow road. I fall asleep and when I wake, we're in an area where all the license plates and street signs are orange. My dad is in the bus' bathroom and I demand to know what state we're in. My dad mumbles his replies - I believe he is intentionally mumbling. I become angry and continue to demand to know what state we're in. I hear my dad say, "Christopher Columbus ..." which angers me even more.

We are at the tennis camp, but there is no equipment or courts and there seems nothing to do. A large security guard lady reads a list of names including mine and my kitten's. She says she's from the FBI and is going to have her eye on us because she hears we're trouble makers. She tells us her name and her name those close to her call her. It's something like "Clara" and "Claretta". I ask if we can be chums and I use her close name. She says no.

Everybody is sitting in bleachers, there's no tennis going on. I think that what I'll do when serving is throw the ball up and hit it on the way back down, but sometimes I'll trick my opponent by hitting the ball on the way up. I notice an open seat next to an attractive girl but walk back towards the entrance of the camp to read some graffiti I saw. I can't decipher anything except one part seems to be a record of the votes of the conservative senator or congressman from the area. Someone from the camp tells me the locals are very right-wing and they made a village for all the Jews to live in and gave it some derogatory name I can't remember.

I turn to walk back to the camp and the attractive girl is right behind me with her eves closed and lips puckered. I kiss her.